Sunday, August 05, 2007

Saturday's Synaptic Succulent's...

...or a few things that make me wish I didn't have any firing in my brain.

  • If you decide to travel to Europe don't start complaining about how the dollar compares to the Euro. You knew it before you went. Keep your ass at home and spend the money here. If you're in London and you spend $600 for a dinner for six that consists of hamburgers, french fries and a few drinks then I have no sympathy for you. You can get a Quarter Pounder w/Cheese for around $2.50 here. Shut your trap and stay at home.

  • If you live near the BP oil refinery that's near Lake Michigan then quit your goddamned bitching about them dumping shit in the lake. You are exposed to far worse things in your daily life than you are even aware of. You're worried about a few things that have been filtered going into the lake, yet you have no problem languishing in the sun for 8 hours, which is probably doing more harm than anything you might be exposed to in the lake. And I don't wanna hear about the drinking water. Most companies that sell bottled water have admitted that it comes from the tap. So buy a PUR filter, you cheap ass hypocrite. If they shut the refinery down you'll be toting those kids on your hip a few hundred miles to enjoy the sand because you won't be able to afford the gas.

  • I'm sorry if you were born black and poor. I didn't have anything to do with it. I was born white and lower middle-class. Shit happens. But don't start smaking off on TV about how your kids ain't got no book bags to tote their shit to school with because the local Baptist church didn't have enough to pass out to the neighborhood you live in. I attended 18 years of school and I never once used anything to carry my books other than my arm. Get off your dead ass and find a way to make the $10 it takes to buy one if you're so worried about it. But quit trying to make the rest of us feel guilty about your inability to do so.

  • I hate the fact that I have high BP and an anxiety disorder. I don't like taking prescription drugs. I took my first Zoloft today and if you combine that with a few glasses of wine(OK, more than a few) you get into quite a state. It works by increasing the amounts of serotonin, a natural substance in the brain that helps maintain mental balance, as if I was ever balanced to begin with. It keeps the serotonin on the synapse just a tad bit longer than it would normally be there. Beats the shit outta me. I'll see how things go, but my guess is I'll dump this thing in a day or two. I may have a dead dick(thank you very much QofD, but it was alive and well this morning. Just no where for it to roam) and cancer but I'd still rather feel normal.

  • When my Dad died I got a tattoo of the Alpha and Omega on my left arm. Keeps me connected. I also got my ear re-pierced. I had it done originally about 20 years ago. I took it out today. After watching some bimbo-bitches dad that had one. And he was probably ten years younger than me. It looked idiotic. I'd keep it if I was in my twenties. But I'm not. Big surprise. But the tattoo, it stays. For reasons you would never understand.

  • The biggest complaint the "former" wife had(I've been told that I shouldn't use "ex" because she isn't a convict) was that we didn't do anything. We did a lot of things until the youngin's came along. Then I thought it was time to tone it down. We still had people over for dinner, went out when we could and basically led the parents with kids life. It wasn't enough. After we got sued by our former landlord, after we had moved into our house, she joined a country club. It wasn't. It was a building that served food and had a pool. So we'd go have dinner a few times a month at said clubhouse and take the kids to the pool on weekends. Most of the people there were like us. Middle-Class, a few kids in tow. But we never saw them eating there. It was all a ruse, IMHO.

    But, I didn't last long after that. She married some VP with PNG that liked to fuck her in the ass. I knew this woman. She wouldn't open her pussy, much less her butt. She went on a two week cruise and said she never took a shit because she would have been embarrassed and didn't want him to smell it in the cabin. Say what? Anyways, that lasted less than six months. There have been others. All experienced the same fate.

    My point is that if, and when, I reach the pearly gates, which I don't believe in to begin with, I can honestly say that my life wasn't all about having fun. I knew what was needed and how to do it. And if it meant that I sacrificed some of the things I wanted to do, then so be it. Nuff said.

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