My First Meme...

...and only because this lady isn't full of herself. I guess the deal is to name the five things about myself that I don't like because of irrational fear of what others think.

• I probably have the worst case of SAD ever recorded, but only in a crowd. If you get me alone I'm as congenial as can be. But in a group people mistakenly find me aloof. Far from it.
  
  
• I avoid going to an MD at any costs because I don't want to hear any crap about my body. Seems odd to me we'd be judged at that venue, but I have been, and that's enough said. Truth be told, it ain't the worst 54 year-old body in the world, just so we're clear.
  
  
• I have exceptional anal hygiene, even with IBS, because one time at the Y when I was a teenager some old fart farted and the guy I was with thought my ass stunk. Since then I fart only around myself and go to great lengths to shit only in my own home. But with IBS that ain't easy. I worry about the shit cops busting through the stall and arresting me on illegal fecal distribution.
  
  
• I try to keep up on intellectual things because everyone thought I was an idiot when I was young. And told me so. So I won't discuss anything dealing with it, even though I can beat you down, because I didn't like the way it felt when it happened to me when I was young and I don't want to feel it again. Hence, I argue with myself alot.
  
  
• I always look in the car mirror before I hesitantly go into a public place and make sure I don't have a two pound booger hanging out of my nose. I once had a boss that walked in the office everyday with a boog in the same place, same nostril. After he left one day I made some comment to the mates and we laughed for the rest of the day about it. I would hate for that to happen to me. I usually shovel mine out with the morning coffee. But I'd hate to be caught.