Just When You Thought People Couldn't Possibly Become More Stupid...

...nor more self-absorbed and indulgent...

comes this story whereby, for the meager sum of $25,000, you can have your ashes spread in these gardens of Duke University. Twenty-fucking-five thousand. To spread your sorry ass amongst the thicket, and your ass won't even know it. I wish I'd been born a goddamn monkey.