I'm Going To Bag This Puppy For A Bit...

...due to my own lack of interest.

Just A Heads Up On...

...on these guys.

At the end of my life when I take that journey all alone
And I’m on my own and there’s no one there to save me
Oh when I look back at all the things that I’ve done wrong
You know I wasn’t always strong lord will you take me

Cause I been down as far as a man can go
I wanna be ready when I hear that whistle blow

CHORUS:
And I’m on the last train running and the devil’s coming
Hoping that my good outweighs the bad
And I’m heading for the station the final destination
Praying for the lord to take my hand
And I’m on the last train running

When I close my eyes and I’m holding on to my last breath
I don’t want my regrets to coming back to haunt me
When it’s far too late to ask forgiveness for my sins
I hope my enemies and friends can both forgive me

Will there be tears for me when I go
Or will I be just another name carved in a stone

CHORUS:
When I’m on the last train running and the devil’s coming
Doing all he can to take my soul
And I’m heading for the station the final destination
Praying for the lord to take me home
And I’m on the last train running
I’m on the last train running

You only get one shot
One chance against the clock and
You only get one life
One chance to make it right

When I’m on the last train running and the devil’s coming
Doing all he can to take my soul or lord won’t you come and take me home
On the last train running
When I’m on the last
On the last train
When I’m on the last train running

Seems As Though The Red Baron...

...dun flew his plane into the front of a nearby restaurant this morning.

Turns out it was only minutes before opening and the crew was in the kitchen prepping and the misers were in the office counting their coffers. But no one was outside standing inline to go feed their faces at the fat factory. So no innocent bystanders suffered any injuries from this stupid maneuver. Only the Baron bit the dust.

Back in the day I had 20 hours of flying time under my belt. First thing they teach you when you go up is that at the first sign of trouble you take the plane as far away from civilians as possible. Apparently the Baron missed this session. I'd like to give the stupid son-of-a-bitch the benefit of the doubt, but he flew over a very populated area, and engine failure usually gives you some kind of warning. Guess he wanted to go down in flames, which is exactly what his ass did. Preliminary investigations suggest no flight plan was logged so one might think this will turn out suspect. I'd agree.

I'd Like To Write More On Politics...

...the media, current affairs and the like, but with the recent turn of events I've decided I won't waste my time or yours spewing forth venom about any of them. They can all kiss my ass

I never watched the first OJ debacle and I'll be damned if I'll have anything to do with it now. And now Dan Rather, at 75 fucking years old, is suing CBS for $75 million dollars. WTF. Just pack it in and move back to Texas. What in the world are you going to do with that kind of money if you win? You already have enough. And Guilliani is over in London smoozing Americans for money. For $1000 a plate you get to sit there and listen to his ass. For $2500 you get to sit there and listen to his ass AND have a picture taken. They don't specify if the picture is with his with ass, but I assume it is.

I have come to find all of it just total bullshit. Nuff said.

A Simple Thanks...

...to those of you that offered up prayers and thoughts for the former wife. Her biopsy came back negative. That was one happy lady on the other end of the phone this afternoon. Me thinks there will be a glass of wine or 12 sucked down tonight on both our parts.

There Aren't Many Redeeming Qualities...

...about having majored in philosophy. Oh sure, it can get some attention at parties when you make someone look like an ass in an argument, but you end up with a drink in your lap.

Nevertheless, it does come in handy at times. Especially when it comes to logic. There are two types in typical logic; deductive and inductive. I prefer the former, simply because if your premises are true the conclusion is true.

Case in point: see the pic? That's called actinic purpura. It happens when you get older or you have severely sun-damaged skin. I ain't that old yet but I do have damaged skin to the 12 hours a day in the sun, and I started seeing them show up a few months ago. Had no idea why it was happening so I researched it and found out the above. Ain't much you can do about it, because they take about a month to disappear and then if they are severe enough they stain your skin. But I thought it odd that they would suddenly start showing up.

Then when I had that episode of my head blowing up like a pumpkin I also found out that things like predisone can make them worse, which they did. Once they finally cleared up I went and had my BP meds changed and suddenly I didn't get them any longer. Until the other day, when I went back to my former medication because the new one wasn't working. Low and damned behold the first thing I woke up to was one of the purpuras. WTF?? Deduction was called for. Research. One of the side-effects of Norvasc is easy bruising. Now I know why they started when they did and why they are now back.

Back in May I decided that after 30 years I should get a regular GP and find out my critical levels(liver enzymes, cholesterol, triglycerides, etc). About 99.9% came back below normal. Yet I've been sick the majority of time since I paid that first visit. Deduction dictates to stay the hell away from those motherfuckers.

As Long As We're Praying This Week...

...it seemed appropriate to include everyone.

Fuck-It Friday...

...and then some.

• We haven't had rain here in almost three months. I'm not in the industry anymore, nor do I own a house, so I don't frankly give a shit. I turn the water off when I brush my teeth, I take a seven minute shower and my dishwasher is set on water miser. So I would appreciate it if the local news channels would quit spending millions of dollars on some new fangled radar that is supposed to tell my ass that it's raining. I can see that.
  
  
• I hate going to bed feeling well and waking up feeling like hell. This morning my throat felt like the furnace in a steel mill. Why is it that our immune system shits the bed when we go to sleep?
  
  
• I had skin cancer surgery last Friday. I went for a check-up today. It's infected. I did everything they told me to do, and then some. It's an old building and the rooms kinda look like my bathroom. I don't think I'd want surgery done there. My ass is done with MD's for awhile.
  
  
• ENOUGH. I don't give a shit what Bush says, that situation is lost. I admire what they are trying to do, but the government over there just isn't capable of reconciling the different wants and needs of the factions. Glad my nephew got out in time.
  
  
• In typical fashion, the powers that be at work have decided that we need to change direction, so they hired that new guy I've written about. All they do now is have meetings. And they forget the simple shit that gets the product out the door. Go figure.
  
  
• This gentleman died this week. I didn't know him all that well, but we did e-mail one another on occasion and comment on each others blog when something tickled our asses. We had one thing in common: big titties. He liked them in red. I didn't give a damn. I liked mine bare. RIP big guy. You had one helluva heart.
  
  

On Monday...

...I will have lived in this city, and my little dungeon, for ten years. There are times when I question whether the decision I made was the correct one. On reflection, it's hardly worth the effort of contemplating. It is what it is.

When the former wife and I owned our house we were inundated with vermin. We lived across from a horse farm, out in the country, and we dealt with everything from black widows to mice. It was a nuisance, for sure, especially when you have two youngin's, but I always found a way to keep the place safe and comfy.

When I moved here to the little box I didn't anticipate any insect problems. I'm not an insect-a-phobe by any stretch. They inhabit the planet same as we. And I tend to give them their space as long as they don't infringe on mine. Live and Let Live. And considering the fact that I live on a lake I've been pretty fortunate as far as that goes. Oh, I've had the black snake on the back porch. Easily dismissed. The one October when every night I would come and find four or five spiders partying in the bedroom. Couldn't for the life of me figure out where they were coming from. Since I like to keep the sliding glass door open in the bedroom that opens to the lake I engaged my investigative skills one evening and found that they had set up a commune in the threshold and would crawl out of the little drip holes and threaten me with what they though was my arachnophobia. Silly little things. I nuked their asses and have been free ever since. OK, every once in awhile some scavenger will find his way in but it is duly disposed of.

Now, in all the years I've been here I've never had to deal with a cricket. I've never liked those SOB's since the first time I used them for bait. They're a pain in the ass to catch and I don't like shoving the hook up their ass. But the other day I came home and all I heard was this chirp-chirp-chirp. I figured it was coming from outside, so I ignored it. Until that night, when, with the sliding door closed, I heard the incessant whine. For three days I tried to track that fucker down and finally isolated it in the bathroom. So I cleaned out the cupboard. Nowhere to be found. Took apart the vent for the AC and the fart fan and sprayed some Raid. Nope. Sat in there again because for some reason those rascals know when you are in their territory. Opened the cupboards again and I swore the intensity of the chirp escalated, so I emptied it again. Nothing.

I was about to resign myself to the fact that I would have a roommate. I have no idea what they eat, but this terrorist was obviously surviving. The next day I was emptying the trash and went and grabbed the bag from the bathroom and took it to the dumpster. Low and damned behold I haven't heard a peep since then. I have no idea how in the hell it ever got in there. And it would have been the last place I looked.

Such is life in the fast lane.

First Off, Let Me Apologize...

...for the fact that I am about to ask for prayer for the second time in one week. The good news about my friends sister is that she has no other cancer in her body and will be operated on the first of next week for the brain tumor, which should be a piece-of-cake as tumors go.

However, on Monday, my former wife has a biopsy scheduled for breast cancer. This is someone that is the Mother of my children, and they don't deserve two parents whom have cancer. I have four ventricles in my heart, and she owns two of them. Even after twenty years of being apart. I offered to be there but she's convinced it's nothing. But I made her promise to call me when she gets the results and if it isn't good news then we get a second opinion here at Duke.

I'm a pretty seasoned veteran when it comes to this stuff, and I'm not naive enough to think that bad things aren't gonna happen. After talking to her last night we just laughed about it and I told her the other one is big enough that they can just take half of that and attach it to the other side. But, goddammit, I don't want my sons having to worry about their parents when they are in the prime of their lives.

We will survive, but if you have some room on that prayer rope of yours I would appreciate it if you could offer a few up for her.

This Is Just Too Damned Funny...

So, It Seems Someone Is Going On Hiatus...

...to pursue writing, and frolicking in the woods and such. And spend time with her family. And maybe write some really good stuff, which she usually does.

And I applaud her for that decision. You see, oft times things are not as they seem. I have talked to said person on an occasion or two. I enjoyed that. She has that southern drawl that will melt your heart and she's feisty enough to tell you to get your ass in the kitchen and finish the fried okra.

There was no great plan here, but something told me that maybe this southern belle had better things to do with her time than waste it on a blog. She finally figured it out. I don't profess to have had anything to do with it. I didn't. But I'm glad she's made the decision she has.

Good luck Babs. I've always admired your writing and your spunk. No hard feelings, I hope. And I hope you and AD get to share many moments together.

And AD, I may be old, but I ain't an "old man" yet. I hope I get to see just a modicum of that state of being.

Let your souls flourish. Sometimes God works in mysterious ways, dontcha think?

I Know I Don't Have Many Readers...

...which is fine. This isn't an ego thing for me, and I would never ask for the prayers for myself.

But I have a very dear friend that lost her Mom a few weeks ago and today her younger Sister had a seizure and they discovered a mass in her brain. This is a pretty strong woman, but even she has her breaking point. So if you are the prayerful type I would appreciate it if you would offer some up on her behalf. She needs them. More so her sister.

It Befuckles Me Why The Dimwits In Congress...

...would want to take this man on. Best I could tell from watching some of the testimony was that he rolled over them like a Bradley.

Whom would know better the state of affairs over there than the guy with four stars on each shoulder? I know he couldn't shoot them all with his .45 so he should have just given them all a coffee enema.

I have no confidence whatsoever in this entire government. They're all just power hungry morons with little concern for the average American. To hell with all of them.

If You Can't Stand The Heat...

...get outta the kitchen.

And all this time of reading her and how she went on and on about how strong she was and a little criticism comes her way and she bails like the little chicken shit she is. And she says she made her decision because the weather is pretty and some such other bullshit. I expected better. And ole AD comments that he supports you no matter what. How noble. What else is the stupid sonofabitch gonna say if he wants to stay in her good graces.

Good riddance, I say.

Never Met The Man...

...but I certainly would have liked to spend a few hours with him. Over a few beers,laughs, music and rumblings.

I'm in a lot of pain this morning from a skin cancer procedure yesterday. I took myself there and drove my own ass home. Most of my family knew about it. And trust me, it wasn't that big of a deal. I live by myself for a reason. But a simple phone call to see if I was OK wouldn't have bothered me. Never got one, save for one friend. For that I am thankful. (ED: one son called today).

There's an art to caring. It comes from the soul. I would like to believe that health care professionals have those souls, but that is their job, so they have to remove themselves from the emotional side of things. As I was going through the procedure yesterday the nurse came in and was going through her usual routine and I just said "Hi Debbie". She seemed taken aback, not just because I remembered her name, but because I wasn't just some pussy laying on a table. I took the time to recognize her and what she was doing.

I didn't need a nurse maid when I got home. Just my Merlot. And some sleep. Hope you got some, because my ass sure as hell didn't.

I Don't Have Much Money...

...so I don't want my ass getting sued for millions, but surfing the TV this afternoon I came across some young woman that had the voice of an angel.

I came in late to her solo, but I have to admit that I was mesmerized by her talent. I didn't pay any attention as to what the program was until she ended her act. Then I realized what show it was. And then the hostess(who's sexuality has always been in question) got up and hugged her and grabbed her pom pom hairdo and hugged her again. And her left BREAST. I saw it with my own two eyes. And it looked to me like she did it intentionally. Because she slid her hand down there. Play the tape and tell me I'm wrong.

I Usually Don't Pick On Old People...

but there comes a time when your ass has to realize that it's time to hang it up.

I've never watched a movie of this gentleman. But I have seen some of his son's work. Some good, some bad. What puzzled me today was why this ancient turtle that had a stroke would would go on a morning news show to hump his book. The humping I get. The part that you can't understand a goddamn thing the old fart says befuddles my ass. I'm sorry he suffered a stroke, but that should have been the key that locks the door to keep his ass inside and not make a fool of himself.

What The Fuck...

...has happened to professional football? I haven't watched a game in about five years, including Super Bowls, but I thought I'd give it a try tonight.

It's even worse than I could have imagined. I used to enjoy going to my sons Junior High and High School games. This shit on TV is nothing but drivel. And I ain't even to the game yet, nor do I plan on seeing it. All fluff. Faith Hill? Please!!!! No wonder these assholes get their asses arrested all the time. They aren't anything but glorified pieces of meat that thrive on bling, pussy and attention.

I long for the day of a Gale Sayers. Now that was football. Fuck the NFL. Faith Hill couldn't tell a linebacker from a jock strap. Money, Money and more Money. Shame.

OH OH...

...seems someone is sitting on their throne and won't play nicely with the other boys and girls.

Of course, when you have a sophomoric attitude when you are perched on the pot then what else would you expect but some criticism and derogatory remarks. And if you can't take them in stride, then either quit acting as if your blog should be off-limits to any personal attacks or make it available only to those you want to visit it.

You may have seen many things in your short life, but they are shrouded in the vacuum you've lived in. The same can be said of all of us. We perceive reality from whence we came. You can dish it out fairly easily, but you sure as hell can't take it.

Smoke A Button...

...and then listen.

I was driving around the city this morning at 4:30 looking for the homeless and hookers that I might take advantage of. I rarely listen to rock radio anymore, but this song came on and I pulled into a parking lot and just soaked it in. The gilded entry of the chords at the beginning that explode into the finale is just spectacular. Some say it's the best rock song of all time. I wouldn't know. Time isn't done yet. Best of when it came out, for sure. Hard to believe it's 36 years old. I was 18 at the time. Still rocks my ass.

I'm Going To Give You An Example...

...of why I despise the medical profession. It should concern you.

I went to my GP on Thursday for a follow-up regarding my blood pressure. It's been pretty good since I've been on Norvasc. Only problem was it made me pee about 200 times a day. I go enough as it is with the PCa, but this was ridiculous. So when I told the MD he said it wasn't a side effect of the drug. NOT TRUE. Since they had just that morning put into effect a new computer system that would allow them to get rid of charts and be totally computerized, I asked him to query the side effects of the drug. Sure enough. He was surprised to learn that although it's an uncommon side effect, it does happen. And if it's uncommon, I'll suffer from it. At that point I was beginning to wonder if maybe I should take over his appointments for the day. I'm sure my bedside manner wouldn't be the best. I'd most likely kick most of the patients out on their asses and tell them to quit bothering me with their minor ailments.

Sooo, the MD suggested I lay off the Norvasc for a week and see if the symptoms subside. If they do but my BP goes up then I should take the script he was giving me. And what was it? THE VERY SAME THING that made my head blow up like the Hindenburg. I just looked at him with disdain and said "Think Again". Oh yeah, you can't take that, can you? DUH!!! So he scripts me for Diltiazem, a calcium-channel blocker. The other that screwed me up was an Ace Inhibitor. He said I should be fine.

So when I got to work I queried said drug and what to my wondering eyes should appear...CONTACT YOUR HEALTHCARE PROVIDER IMMEDIATELY IF YOU EXPERIENCE SWELLING OF THE FACE, EYES, LIPS, TONGUE, ARMS OR LEGS. I will never go back to that mother fucker again.

And nurses are no better. The hospice nurse my Dad had thought she was god's gift to the world and I should be more engaged in his care. Fuck you, bitch. I take care of him 24-7. You come twice a week. He was doing moderately well for the 3 1/2 months I had been there. Then one afternoon she tried to cath him with a '22. A fucking '22. This is a 74 year old guy with a urethra the size of a needle with stricture and she's trying with a fucking '22? She gave up. I suggested maybe a '14. She didn't have one, so she sent diapers over that night. Talk about humiliation. Then a week later she told him one afternoon that the cancer was probably in his brain. He died two days later because his ass just gave up. And this healthcare "professional" left the afternoon she told him that on a two week vacation. She never had to experience the aftermath of her "caring". So fuck you Ms. Moose and all the nurses out there. I can take someone's BP, I can pull you out of cardiac arrest, I can limit the damage of a heart attack by placing an aspirin under your tongue and I carry a disposable scalpel in my carry case in the event you need a trach. Only thing I can't do is call one of the dipshit MD's and tell them to give you something. Which, if they don't research might well kill your ass. Nice profession, people.

Heaven, Hell, The Pearly Gates, The Gates Of Hell...

...Saint Peter and Beelzebub.

This is my idea of what I'd like to see when my days here are done. Include a good Merlot and some chocolate and berries and I'd be sanctifying my ass. Not likely to happen. I never have that kinda luck. God kicked my ass down here in a fit of rage, and best I can figure heading back up, or down, ain't gonna be none too pleasant.

Alas, it remains a mystery. I've studied all the practicing religions in the world, as well as all the scientific explanations, from Einstein's theory of relativity to the most popular, String theory. I've read "Issues In Science And Religion", that dealt with all the Medieval theories. I've read Jacques Ellul's "False Presence Of The KingDom". I've read Bertrand Russell, de Chardin, Whithead, Chesterton, Sagan, Jung and Kung, C.S. Lewis, Plato, Aristotle, Aquinas, Newton and Windows. And after this exhaustive research I can honestly say that I'd still choose Liv on my deathbed. Call me stupid. My energy would understand.